Return from Oz
Okay so I couldn't think of a better title! I am back and I have missed writing and reading comments. Thanks to everyone who visited whether you left a comment or not.I am entering a rather scary time of life or at least I will on July 31st. I have submitted my resignation from my job of 10 1/2 years and will be retired. When I began working at my place of business way back in 1994, I never dreamed I would still be here in 2006. It was just a job to help get my girls through college and to help me deal with my older daughter leaving home for the first time. I moved around from department to department and even took a leave of absence for about a year before coming back to the familiar. Suddenly I was looking at ten years of employment and enough time to have my pension vested. I'm going to have a pension one day!! Wow! Anyway, I am more than ready to not have to drag myself in to a 9 to 5 job every single day of the year except for two weeks of vacation time.
Even so, there is this tinge of dread or something lurking around the edges of my brain that blooms into full fledged panic at times at the thought of being all by myself all day everyday. I haven't done this in a long time. Fortunately these are not frequent. Much more frequent are the dreams of what I can do now that I couldn't do before. For instance, I could do that volunteer program at the medical center that involves working with patients who are dealing with cancer or other serious diseases to help them emotionally. I would love that. I will now be available on occasion for those times when someone needs a ride to the doctor or to get their medicine. Both good things.
I plan to spend the day at Our Lady of Grace Monastery on the days that I meet with Sister Paula and just walk the labarynth or read or whatever the Spirit leads me to do. I will also have the time to do all of those Bible studies I have but haven't had time to work through.
My one problem here is the decrease in income that comes with a retirement. I've gotten very accustomed to the lifestyle I've lived for a while now, even though in the beginning I was not going to do that. With time came the entitlement. You know, I deserve to buy this for myself since I work so hard, etc, etc, etc. That's a great lie Satan has whispered many times into my ear and I've fallen hard for it. Now I have to come back around to living on what we make and being satisfied with what I have rather than what I want. It is actually very difficult to make the decisions of what you are going to let go of and what you really need. It isn't going to be easy even though I am very willing (in my lucid moments) to let go of wants and live more frugally. I will definitely need prayers for this. I want to be able to clearly see where I need to cut back and even how to cut back drastically. I may as well get it over with all at once than drag it out over the next few years until my husband retires and I have to cut back again.
So I am asking for prayers that I will learn to spend wisely, both in my time and in money. I want very much to be godly in my purchases and in what I do with the time he is giving me. I am excited to have the chance to do something different for a while. Of course, about the time I get my feet back under me and comfortable with my life again, my husband will retire and we'll go through it again. Isn't life grand!
posted by Dana @ 4:30 PM
1 comments
